the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Randomize
