She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Randomize
