its not stalking. its research.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize