Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
I wish I only lived at night.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
cat food counts as protein by the way
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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