It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
