I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
I don't think brook has ever known best
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Randomize
