Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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