Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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