yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
