my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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