Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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