When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Randomize
