I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
