If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
please come you make the beer taste better
We got so high we made milksteak
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
