Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
