Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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