I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Randomize
