Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Randomize
