I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
