Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
How external is "for external use only"?
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
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