youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Randomize
