"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Randomize
