Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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