He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize