I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
