Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
my mouth tastes like poor choices
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
