2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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