I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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