Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
How external is "for external use only"?
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I could fuck to npr.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize
