I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
