So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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