so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Randomize