there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
