Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Randomize
