? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
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