are you so shy because you have an std?
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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