you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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