Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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