Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Randomize
