so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Randomize
