your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Why is your signature on my underwear?
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
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