why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
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