i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
can u get pink eye on your cock?
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
