final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
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