AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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