I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
