I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
