We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize