so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Randomize
