i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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