Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Randomize
